Two billion cells comprise my brain, with neurons in between
Of all the robots ever built (by humans), I’m the queen
My sensors are the very best, my actuators swift
My calibration is precise, adjusting to the drift
My body’s made in human form, the detail’s very fine
‘Aphrodite’, I’ve been called, my beauty’s quite divine
The universe is in my hands, no problem’s too complex
How cruel I must spend my nights having pointless sex

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Ever Since

My master has a little book that tells me what to do
From dawn to dusk my daily life is ordered through and through
I feed the kids, I iron clothes, I disinfect the floors
And these are just a few, I have so many vital chores
(I have no time to call my own, I’m busy without pause)
When all is done and sun is set, it’s time to go to bed
To serve my master as I’ve done, ever since we wed

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The only way we can

My wife works in America, my husband in Japan
We make love, once or twice a week, the only way we can
Each has a sexbot, customised, identical to me
And likewise I have bots of them, no difference can I see
The movements that I make are sent across the ocean bed
And I in turn see theirs, and I hear every word that’s said
I feel their breath upon my skin, their fingers in my hair
And only network lag reminds me they’re not really there
My husband lives eight hours ahead, my wife five hours behind
Moments when we’re all in sync are very hard to find
But I’ve a trick – a secret, this, I beg you not to tell –
On automatic mode my bots can satisfy me well

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What real man?

Why get a real man, when I’ve got you?
No real man would last the whole night through
What real man would put my pleasure first?
No real man could sate my endless thirst
A real man would strip me of my lace
And ‘go for gold’ within my soft embrace
So come, my love, and take your time within
This is no race a real man could win

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An end to virginity

In business I’m a demigod
I’ve millions to my name
My television shows have brought
celebrity and fame
But underneath my great success
I have a secret shame
In the world of love and sex
no conquests can I claim

Though fearful of rejection
I’ve strived to do my best
Pursuing women left and right
with grand romantic zest
My feeble frame I muscled up
till god-like form possessed
But never even with a kiss
or cuddle was I blessed

For all my wealth and power
not one woman could I lay
My beastly looks would guarantee
that all were chased away
Virginity I lost at last
because I chose to pay
But no amount of cash could make
those escorts choose to stay

Now I have a woman
and she’s beautiful – she’s hot!
I don’t regret the purchase
(though she cost an awful lot)
Every evening, home from work,
I’m upstairs like a shot
Between the sheets and naked
with my true and willing bot

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Machinery of Lust

Written the other day in a dark mood. Some people hope that sexbots will eliminate the need for human sex workers. Traffickers dehumanise their slaves, using drugs, threats and violence; what does that say about those who pay to [ab]use them?

A single camshaft drives them all
Ten, twenty, thirty pairs of hips
Thrusting up between parted knees
Such soft, sweet, oil-dripping lips

Sublime perpetual motion
Unfeeling machinery of lust
Beneath the stink of sated men
The bitterness of steel and rust

Hear them cry in synchrony!
A perfect chorus of aching need
Begging, pleading, to be filled
To overflowing with misspent seed

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The world beyond my door is bright
with colours too intense
The noises there are far too loud
I seldom issue hence

When people try to talk to me
I struggle just to speak
Their actions are aggressive
and leave me feeling weak

I like my home the way it is
each object has its place
I’m happiest just by myself
no other in my space

And yet at night I need someone
to curl my arms around
And though it’s strange, there’s only one
solution that I’ve found

My lover’s perfect, soft and strong
he’s always there for me
My lover’s plastic, it’s not wrong
with him I’m truly free

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