With a title like Suzie and the Monsters – a fairytale of blood, sex and inhumanity, it’s no surprise, perhaps, that some people expect it to be erotica with tentacles. It’s not, of course; the monsters in the novel are very human, and despite plenty of explicit content it’s not erotica. I’ve never really felt qualified to write erotica.
But erotic and explicit? Always interesting. Tentacles? Disturbing, but why not. And let’s throw in some nuns for good measure – it’s funny, but my most popular poem (in terms of page views, at least) has to be Vampire Nun Orgy. So: Once more unto the (experimental poetry) breach, dear friends, once more!
An erotic horror in iambic pentameter…
The stagecoach hurtled through the twilight gloom
The atmosphere oppressive as a tomb
The driver cracking loud his snarling whip
The reins held tight in his white-knuckled grip
A tolling bell sang out a mournful call
With warning of the even’s hastening fall
A glimpse of sky revealed their frightful fate
‘The sun has set!’ the driver cried. ‘Too late!’
The carriage braked and loud the horses screamed
As misty tendrils through the forest streamed
‘Get out!’ he yelled. ‘You must not here delay.
My ladies, please, oh follow me this way!’
Three ladies stumbled out with grumbling fear
‘You’ve doomed us all,’ they cried, ‘by stopping here!’
The driver shook his head. ‘You have one chance
To still escape this monster’s evil dance.’
He turned and hurried through the misty wood
The ladies chased him quickly as they could
He led them to an ageing narrow track
But soon the mists and darkness hid his back
An ancient church stood proud against the night
The space within was warm with candlelight
Alone they gazed around with grateful awe
Their safety guaranteed by holy law
Just by the door they left their muddy shoes
Their cloaks were laid along the wooden pews
They thanked their God for keeping them alive
And prayed that soon the driver would arrive
In habits black and white they knelt and prayed
While in the corners taunting shadows played
Their maiden voices sang out joyful hymns
Surrounded by a hundred coiling limbs
A dozen arms reached out to grab and hold
And strip the nuns to leave them bare and cold
A dozen more reached out to maul and squeeze
And whip the nuns to torture them and tease
The ladies’ terror started soon to fade
As tentacles reached out and kept them splayed
Their shrieks of horror slowly turned to sighs
As limbs like serpents coiled around their thighs
A thousand fingers danced across their skin
Seducing their surrender to this sin
Each fingertip a round-mouth labium
Inducing their intoxicating cum
The tentacles in search of treasure wormed
The lustful nuns in search of pleasure squirmed
Three slimy serpents hardened very thick
Three slimy serpents more were just as slick
Sweet Sister Mary’s mouth was open wide
A coiling cock was quick to plunge inside
Between her virgin pussy lips one slipped
She shivered as her clit was licked and nipped
Elizabeth was treated just the same
It wasn’t long before she screamed and came
Wee Annie kept her teeth clamped firmly shut
Instead a phallus wriggled in her butt
Impaled, abused, the ladies had no rest
For hours they writhed inside a monstrous nest
Demonic seed soon filled each woman’s womb
Ensuring thus a dark and certain doom
Until at last the sun shone through the glass
Reflecting brightly from the altar brass
The virile fertile limbs recoiled away
To leave the pregnant nuns to face the day
Francis James Franklin (Alina Meridon) 